Wednesday, August 6, 2008


I am glad to finally start blogging. Creating a blog and actually posting in it has been on my 'to do list' for a long time, finally i am getting round to doing just that, good for me.

Why do i crave to join the already saturated blog sphere?

I am indeed amazed at the tremendous opportunity provided by free blogs to allow people communicate and share opinions from all over. I have come across some amazing blogs, I have shared and learn from peoples experiences, the release, the rants, the frustrations, the compassion, the need to reach across ,build bridges and of course the opportunity to be very opinionated!
What is this blog all about?
Yeah, i intend to open up and share a significant part of my life on this blog, i am a feminist, it is not something I do part time, or a cap i take off when it gets hot, it is simply my life, so you are going to be reading stuffs on feminism, good for you, i say. Also, i am going to be discussing sexual diversity, seeing that i belong to the "queer" group and live in a very, very ultra homophobic environment, yeah, there surely would be discussions and rantings on sexual diversity, which of course would also include discussions on sex. Well, i would be talking religion or my lack of belief in religion, i am an atheist , so that figures.
I should be commenting on general issues and happenings in my life and society , so keep in touch and yeah, your comments are welcome. No, i do not need your hate comments but would appreciate well thought out comments no matter how diverse. Thank you.


I just can't understand the way some people want to control the lives of others which of course include telling them who to love or not love. Do we ever stop to wonder why we assume that heterosexual love is the only right love? What does it matter who we love or decide to have sex with so far it is with consenting adult(s)? How much are we conditioned by society, family, religious beliefs, media etc when choosing a partner? How much of our relationship preferences are learned behaviour?

I am bisexual, i appreciate my bisexuality, the ability to be attracted to both men and women, although this for me goes beyond biological sex. Why is it so difficult to have a relationship not base on gender roles? Even when i am in a same sex relationship, i am often asked who the husband is? Must relationship be based on husband/wife dichotomy which translates to gender stereotype?

I just want to be myself and expect my partner to be himself or herself, i do not want roles , i just want to be me. I do not want to be a husband or wife, i just want to be a loving partner. My ex hated that word "partner", she felt it was too businesslike, but well, i want an emotional / physical partnership, for a partnership you sure need a partner. It is so difficult sometimes to get this message across . With a man, the society has already conditioned him to believe he has the upper hand in relationships with the opposite sex, he takes it for granted that you really are at his service, and for the so called progressives men , they believe they should be given a pat on the back for conceding some rights to women.

Same sex relationships have this problem too, i am always disappointed when a prospective date starts asking if i am the man in a relationship or woman, translation : what is your gender role in a relationship? I do not need a gender role. I do look forward to having a great relationship with someone who is not constrained by gender roles. Yes, i want a genderless love or atleast a genderless relationship, is it too much to ask for?


The million dollar question! I really get peeved when asked this question especially when it comes with that look and disbelieving exclamation " You mean you really don't believe there is god? You crazy or something? Not forgetting that very annoying question "what happened to make you not believe in god? Why do people assume that something terrible must have happened for you to have lost "faith" .
Well, the news is there was no big bang that left me gasping for faith. It just happened that i am not convinced that there is a god designing our destinies, taking care of our needs, waiting for us to ask him so he shall give. I don't believe there is an omnipotent , omniscience , all knowing being watching from high above and why not down below anyway? I guess we don't like the idea of stepping on god? Well, high above sounds better, afterall heaven looks so impenetrable but with space shuttles, it doesn't look so impenetrable anymore.

Anyway, it is my humble believe that man made god not the other way round, However, i have also realised that there are as many gods as there are religions and people. People tend to create god that suits them and their particular situation consciously or unconsciously. No big deal about exercising our imaginations but it becomes a big deal when you judge others base on your own particular god beliefs or want to force your particular belief down the throat of others, even when they do not share your beliefs. And when you try to govern a state base on your brand of religion, that indeed would be doing great injustice to those who do not believe in your religion, and that's not forgetting the children who are force to believe, with fear being the main convincing factor.

Yes, i do not believe in a god, i do not feel i need a religion to feel high, low, solemn, guilty, moral, immoral, good, bad, favoured, blessed etc, I do not have a soul crying to be saved. i just wished people would really appreciate that it is no big deal! LIVE AND LETS LIVE!